If I was your older sister,

“You are so brave and quiet I forget that you are suffering.”

- Ernest Hemingway

…

If I was your older sister,

what would I tell you?

Tell the ones on the side lines: the ones questioning, the ones wondering?

If you feel alone, or

even if if you don’t…

To have many friends is not to be understood.

To be agreed with is not always to be heard.

Just because you have

Does not mean you hold.

Just because they ask

Doesn’t mean they care.

Just because you can

Doesn’t mean you should.

Just because it’s hard,

Doesn’t mean it’s wrong.

Just because it seems impossible,

Doesn’t mean it is.

Just because the voices are loud,

doesn’t mean they are right.

…

“Thesis topic not fixable, unattainable.”

I don’t know about you, but it seems like I run into that wall often.

The not fixable wall.

The feeling of attainable wall.

I think Joseph felt those walls?

Saving Egypt from starving-

Unattainable?

When he saw his brothers again after everything that had happened- Unfixable?

But despite those walls he tried.

Even because of the walls he loved what was right.

So to the lonely, please keep chasing goodness.

To the fighting, chase opportunity.

But.

Remember something for me…

Maybe the opportunity to take right now is to slow down in that turn, because someone does care.

Maybe the goodness is to put on the smile that’s hard.

Maybe it’s saying no to false beauty.

Maybe it’s saying no to what seems like the easy answer right now.

Maybe it’s stepping outside of your comfort zone.

Maybe it’s pausing to think if they are dreams or a mirror house of nightmares before chasing them.

Maybe it’s taking the risk of loving.

And seeing love as the washing of another’s feet.

Maybe it’s seeking out those they say are blemished, but you know have been forgiven or can be.

Maybe it’s standing up for right, even if it means stepping into the dark to turn that light on.

Maybe it’s sitting with the vulnerable and leaving the loud behind.

Maybe it’s saying the hard truth.

Or maybe right now the opportunity is to ask for help…

Maybe it’s standing up right now,

even if it feels like your heart won’t let you.

Maybe it’s to keep going right, even if all else seems like it’s going wrong.

Maybe it’s holding onto hope one more time.

Maybe it’s doing the hard thing.

Because yes it could hurt, but it could heal.

Maybe it will fail, but you won’t know until you step.

Maybe the goodness is taking the chance; to do the uncommon, the kind, the raw, the real.

In a world of glass mirrors of false goodness,   small self made gods, and deep pits; maybe like Joseph, it’s about doing the next thing right thing before you.

Good was never the easy, but it is always right

Truth was never the comfortable, but it’s always the comforting.

Even if it’s dark, find one star.

Hold onto at least one hand that cares. Maybe they care imperfectly; but if they turn your gaze the best they can to heavenly shores:

if they give you hope, if they know your tears, and if they are willing to be there- is that not enough?

When it gets hard, when the crowds fade at your flaws, when the grim taste of sorrow fills you…

the shoulders you can cry on will be those that remain through your best and at your worst.

Maybe they fail some days, but is your scarlet letter less red than theirs?

“He who is without sin cast the first stone.”

Jesus said.

And to the woman?

“Go and sin no more”

He is the light of the world, your yesterday is now your testimony and tomorrow can be different.

Because to the truly broken, it’s never lonely for long.

To the truly hopeful, it’s never dark forever.

A loving gaze is upon you, gives you strength to rise and try again.

One mistake is not forever, when wrapped in forgiveness.

One day doesn’t have to be a week.

Years don’t have to be a lifetime.

Fight, kick, scream, my sister.

Run, cry, overcome, my brother.

Darling,

Fear doesn’t have to be the end.

This doesn’t have to be the end.

You don’t know what lies beyond tomorrow if you don’t get up.

The Author is writing, step forward onto the next page.

Just stand up, slow down, put it down one more time.

From,

Your older sister